Breakwater Bay: A Novel Read online

  But today she felt a stirring brought on by the first of the warm weather. So she put on her muck boots and zipped up a canvas jacket. Tied her hair up with a scarf and went out to the shed.

  She didn’t get out the hand tiller. The sound it made always made her think it was chewing up the soil. Which it was but she didn’t want to hear it. And it made the air smell like gasoline.

  She got out the pointed-tip hoe and long-handled digging fork. She still planted a kitchen garden every year and canned and froze the produce like she still had a growing family to feed. Most of it went into care packages for Dan’s family. Or to Alden.

  Therese clicked her tongue, thinking of her neighbor. Sighed. She didn’t often get impatient with him. But today she wanted to give him a good shaking. Always sitting over in that big old house, drawing fairy tales and refusing to give himself a life. A good life that he deserved. One that he could have if he would just . . .

  It was right in front of his face, and he just couldn’t, wouldn’t see it. She leaned her tools against the chicken wire fence, raised the hoe, and broke the first soil of spring.

  The sun was actually hot on her back. The soil was just crusting, and beneath the top layer it was moist and rich.

  It felt good to be working in the soil again, even though she knew she would be stiff tomorrow. The price of old age. Or maybe just the price of not exercising enough.

  Therese stuck the hoe in the ground and straightened up, stretching her lower back. She went over to the stump, and took a nice long drink from the jar of iced water, while she looked over the land. There was still a good fifty acres. Not a huge amount, but enough to leave her grandchildren.

  Hard to have your child die before you, but Laura had left her grandsons and Meri. And they could keep the property intact or divide it up among themselves. She and Dan had discussed it. She’d tried to sign it over to him after Laura was gone, but he’d refused and had the lawyer draw up her will in favor of the next generation.

  When she tried to protest, he merely said, “They won’t turn me away if I’m still kicking. It’s a Calder and now a Calder Hollis tradition to take in those who need to be taken in.”

  He was a good man. Laura was lucky to have found him. Therese had been really worried about her. Even after Meri was born, Laura took no delight in anything other than that child. In those days, Therese still kept a few working acres and hired day help for the planting and picking. She’d pack up Laura and Meri and go into the farmer’s stand each week with a truckload of tomatoes and corn.

  One day, they were setting up when Dan Hollis pulled up to the side of the road and asked for directions. He flirted with Meri who was a charming toddler at almost three. No terrible twos for her.

  He sat and had some homemade lemonade, bought a dozen ears of corn, and Therese nearly fell over when she heard Laura laugh at something he said. He came back every Tuesday for the next month and a half, and then one day he asked Laura if she would have dinner with him.

  Laura said no, but Meri reached up to him and he picked her up. The three of them went on a date that night.

  Now, if she could just see Meri happily situated. She knew the boys would take care of themselves. Gabe and Penny were already about to bless her with her first great-grandchild. Now there was a milestone.

  And that meant she better get this soil tilled before she got any older; she went back to work, still thinking about Meri. She had a profession she loved. But she knew Meri had a lot more to give. And needed more to make her complete.

  Maybe that was just her own old-fashioned attitude. But just because something was old-fashioned didn’t mean it didn’t work. She paused to brush some sweat off her forehead, Therese saw Alden’s lanky figure striding across the meadow. She could tell even at this distance that he was upset. And Alden didn’t get upset much, not anymore.

  And he was another one. He just needed a little nudge. A little nudge? He needed a bulldozer. She went back to hoeing, ignoring him. Just as he reached the garden gate she grabbed the hoe and swayed. Her hand came to her forehead.

  “Therese!” He rushed toward her just as she began to sink to the ground.

  Chapter 21

  Meri’s landline was ringing as she unlocked the door to the apartment. No one ever called her landline; she kept it mostly for telemarketers. Voice mail picked up, and she heard Alden’s voice.

  She dropped her packages and hurried to answer it.

  “Where have you been? I’ve been calling you for an hour.”

  “Out shopping. Why didn’t you call my cell?”

  “I did.”

  “Oh, sorry; I turned it off when we went to breakfast and I guess I forgot to turn it back on. What’s up? Nothing’s wrong? Gran’s okay?”

  “Therese is okay, though she had a little dizzy spell. She refused to go to the emergency room, but old Dr. Jarvis came out to check her over.”

  “Oh dear, should we come home?”

  “She says not to, but I think you should come anyway. Besides, there’s been a change of plans. They’re picking up Nora in the morning.”

  “But that’s only Saturday.”

  “My fault. I called Jennifer to ask if Nora could stay. She of course went into a tirade and ended by telling me to have her ready to leave in the morning. I knew better, but I didn’t want Nora to think I hadn’t tried. Instead, I just fucked it up.”

  “Do you want to talk to her?”

  “Not really, but I guess I’d better.”

  Meri reluctantly handed Nora the phone. “It’s your dad.”

  The laughing, happy teenager of the afternoon suddenly became wary. “Hello?”

  Meri stood nearby as she watched Nora listen, her expression becoming stormier with each passing second.

  “It’s not fair.”

  Meri put a comforting hand on her back, but she flinched away. It wasn’t fair, to child or father. But right now, Meri was more concerned about Gran.

  “Oh no. Is she okay?”

  He must be telling her about Gran. “No, it’s okay. I know Meri will want to come home tonight. I do, too.” She glanced over at Meri. Her eyes were that strange gray, the same as Alden’s, and she recognized the storm clouds gathering there.

  “Sure, Daddy, I understand. No, it’s okay. I’d rather spend the time with you and Gran and Meri. Sure. Sure. I’ll put Meri back on.” She handed the phone back to Meri.

  “Don’t worry about it,” Meri said. “Nora and I will deal; there will be other times.” She smiled at Nora who stood close by. “And I will feel better if I see Gran for myself. Can I talk to her?”

  “She’s napping, but the doctor says she’s fine. She was out hoeing the damn garden. I don’t know why she just didn’t ask me to do it. I’ve been here all weekend.”

  “Because she likes to do it herself, Alden. It’s not your responsibility. You can’t take care of everything.”

  “But he can try,” Nora mumbled.

  “We’ll be out as soon as we can get it together.” Meri looked at Nora. Nora nodded. She was totally on board, though Meri knew she must be disappointed about missing the karaoke bar. She was disappointed herself. But she wouldn’t rest easy until she made sure Gran was all right.

  And besides, she needed to get Nora home.

  “Do we need to pick anything up? Prescription? Food? Can you stay with her until we get there? I know, stupid question. See you soon.” She hung up. “Sorry.”

  “It doesn’t matter,” Nora said, trying to put on a brave face.

  “I just really need to check on Gran.”

  “I know; I do, too. Besides, I have to leave in the morning.”

  “I know, he just told me. At least he tried to get them to let you stay.”

  “He didn’t try hard enough.” Nora went into the bathroom and shut the door.

  Meri hesitated; there was nothing she could say. Alden assured her that Gran was okay. He would never lie about something that serious. But she still felt uneasy and wante
d to be home. As far as Nora was concerned, she was sorry that things hadn’t worked out the way Nora had wanted. But she wasn’t surprised. And she bet that beneath her disappointment, Nora wasn’t either.

  Meri called Carlyn and told her the situation.

  “Tell Nora next time she’s here, it’s a date.”

  “Thanks.” Meri hung up and threw clothes into a suitcase. They were on the road in less than a half hour.

  Neither of them felt much like talking. Meri had known Alden long enough to read between the lines. He sounded upset, but she thought it was more about Jennifer hijacking Nora’s last days with him. She knew if Gran had really been ill, he would have taken her to the hospital, no matter what.

  “My mother’s like that woman on the rocks,” Nora said out of the silence.

  Meri startled; the woman on the rocks? She hadn’t told Nora specifics of her adoption.

  “The one in Dad’s drawing. You know, she lured men to their death.”

  Meri breathed. “The siren. Nora, I know you’re mad at your mom right now, but don’t you think you’re being a little harsh?”

  Nora didn’t answer, and Meri couldn’t think of an argument in Jennifer’s favor. And she wondered if that’s what Alden thought about Riley. Did he think she had lured him to a metaphorical death? And if he did, how could he possibly love her daughter?

  They spent the rest of the ride in silence.

  Meri drove straight to the farm. As soon as she stopped the car, both she and Nora jumped out and ran inside. Alden was already at the kitchen door, looking as formidable as any romantic hero or villain could ever look. And Meri was so relieved to see him.

  He put his fingers to his lips. “Do not upset her.” He gave a significant look to Nora who chose to ignore him.

  Meri couldn’t deal with the two of them at the moment; she brushed past him and tiptoed into the parlor. She found Gran sitting in her recliner, an afghan over her lap.

  She smiled weakly at Meri. Meri fell to her knees beside her chair.

  “I’m fine, child, just a little dizzy spell. Stayed out in the sun too long. That’s all.”

  “Are you sure? Don’t you just want to go to the emergency room to make sure?”

  “Absolutely not. Alden already dragged poor Nelson Jarvis over here to check me out. I’m fine.”

  She lifted her hand and made a gesturing motion with her finger. Nora was standing in the doorway, but she came tiptoeing into the room.

  She knelt down on the other side of Gran’s chair. She looked frightened.

  “I’m sorry to have spoiled your plans.”

  Nora shook her head. “You didn’t.”

  “And don’t be angry at your father. He didn’t ruin them either.”

  Nora’s mouth tightened. “I’m not.”

  “Can we get you anything?” Meri asked. “Tea, some soup?”

  “I’ve got everything I need. Alden is being the ridiculously attentive, sweet boy—man that he is.”

  “I know. He can be a little overprotective,” Nora said. “It’s because he didn’t have a mother growing up.”

  Gran laughed softly. “Where do you young folks get these ideas?”

  Meri smiled, but Nora said seriously, “I learned it in my psychology class.”

  “You study psychology in high school?”

  Nora nodded, then blurted out, “Don’t get sick, please.” Her face crumpled, and she buried her face in the arm of the chair.

  Gran patted her hair. “To every season . . .”

  “Don’t,” Meri said.

  Gran clicked her tongue. “I was just going to say that this old hen isn’t ready to go yet. I just got a little dizzy. It would have passed unnoticed if Alden hadn’t been on his way over and seen me. He kind of overreacted. And you, young lady, can tell me the psychological reason for that.”

  Nora managed a smile. “Overdeveloped superego. He tries to fix everything like he’s responsible for the world. He’s the same way with me and Lucas.”

  “Because,” Gran said, “he loves you and wants the best for you.” She looked from Nora to Meri. “For all of us.”

  “Then why—” Nora broke off at a look from Meri.

  “You and your father will work it out.” Gran sat up a little straighter. “So I hear you two had quite the shopping spree. Come show me what all you bought.”

  Nora retrieved her bags from the car and deposited them on the couch. “I got this at this cool little boutique on the wharf.” She held up a cropped knit top in watermelon. It had a boat neck and raglan sleeves, and it brought out the color in her complexion.

  Next came a dress, a simple sheath with Keith-Haring-type characters frolicking across the fabric. She’d said it reminded her of Alden’s drawings, so they bought it. Meri bet she wasn’t feeling so excited about it now.

  Alden had stayed in the kitchen, and Meri heard the occasional clatter of pans. He was keeping himself busy and out of the way.

  “Oh, try that one on,” Gran said. “I want to see what it looks like on you.”

  If Meri was worried about overtaxing Gran with a fashion show, she’d been wrong. Gran had made a remarkable recovery from frail to enthusiastic. Nora disappeared into Gran’s bedroom and came out a few minutes later, wearing her new purchase.

  “I love that,” Gran said. And stirred the air with her finger, for Nora to turn around.

  Meri began to relax. Gran looked just fine to her; maybe she had just gotten overheated.

  As Nora continued to try on her new purchases, Meri became aware of Alden standing in the hall, a little back from the opening as if he was afraid of disturbing the suddenly festive atmosphere.

  She motioned him in, but he only stepped farther back. She was surprised to find herself irritated by his self-inflicted isolation. What was wrong with the man? His daughter was actually enjoying herself, when only a short while ago, Meri had been sure she would be filled with anger and recriminations. Meri shook her head at him and proceeded to ignore him.

  When Nora had paraded all her new purchases before them, she pulled up a chair next to Gran and the two of them chattered away, the dizzy spell forgotten.

  Meri decided Gran’s spell had been a false alarm. So while Nora talked and Gran asked questions, Meri wandered out to the kitchen to find Alden stirring a pot on the stove.

  “Double Bubble, toil and trouble?” Meri asked, regressing to her childhood mistake of thinking Shakespeare had been talking about bubble gum.

  Alden looked over his shoulder at her. His mouth quirked but made it nowhere near the smile she’d hoped for.

  She went over to the stove and took the spoon from his hand. “I’ll do this; why don’t you visit with Nora and Gran?”

  He didn’t answer, just pulled out a kitchen chair and sat down.

  “Don’t do this,” she said. “At least make Nora’s last night here fun.”

  “She’s having fun.”

  “No thanks to you,” Meri said, exasperation making her voice sharp.

  He stood up, grabbed his coat from the back of the chair, and walked out the back door without a word.

  Meri stared after him. Never, never in her life had she seen him do something like that. He had infinite patience with her, with Nora and Lucas, with Gran. Sure, he got exasperated with her. She’d heard him really angry when he was married. But he’d never just walked away from her. Or any of them.

  She went to the back door and looked out, wondering if she should go after him. But he was almost home. He’d be inside before she reached him, even if she ran. Would he open the door to her like he had the rainy night she’d learned about Riley?

  Something in her world had shifted since that night. She was suddenly unsure about whether he would let her in, or if the door would be closed to her. It was something she wasn’t willing to test. Not tonight.

  Gran and Nora came laughing into the kitchen.

  “Where’s Alden?” Gran asked.

  “He went home,” Meri said, conc
entrating on stirring the soup.

  “Oh, Alden, Alden, Alden.”

  “Is he mad? Is it my fault? Maybe I should go.” Nora looked around, but Meri couldn’t tell if it was to locate her things or to memorize the room in case she never saw it again.

  “You sit right down and have some soup,” Gran said. “I made it last night, and we’ll all feel a good deal better after we’ve eaten. Then you can take a container to your father.

  “Nora, get yourself a glass of milk or soda out of the fridge. Meri, there’s still some wine from the bottle Alden brought over yesterday. I’ll serve the soup.”

  Her grandmother only drank on special occasions. “Do you want a glass?”

  “I certainly do.”

  Meri saw a sparkle in Gran’s eye that she couldn’t quite make out. Fever? Amusement? Or was it just her imagination?

  Gran and Meri tried to keep a lively conversation going, and Meri was afraid that it was taxing her grandmother’s strength, but Gran seemed in high spirits. Meri just hoped all this fun wasn’t going to cause her to have another episode.

  Nora ate her soup, helped Meri with the dishes while Gran watched, then gathered up her backpack and packages to go home.

  Gran gave her a big hug.

  “I’ll walk you over,” Meri said.

  “I need you here,” Gran said. “We’ll watch you from the door to make sure you get home safe.”

  Confused, Meri gave Nora a hug and told her to keep practicing her moves so she’d be ready for karaoke when she got back for the summer.

  Nora thanked her for everything. “I’ll come over tomorrow to say good-bye, if that’s okay.”

  “Of course it is. You’d better not leave without saying good-bye.”

  “Go on now.” Gran smiled encouragingly. Meri walked Nora to the door, and they watched her walk over the meadow burdened down with her suitcase and new purchases.

  “What’s going on?” Meri asked. “Why are you making her walk home by herself?”